Three “endangered” families are most vulnerable to divorce
Despite a one-year peacemaking success rate of 66.
6%, but 73-year-old Xie Yunmei still feels pity, emotion and helplessness for more than 30% of couples who go their separate ways.
Xie Yunmei works in the city’s first marriage and health consultation room, which is established in the Civil Affairs Bureau of Putuo District to specifically advise, reconcile, and awkward couple relationships.
In her early years, she was an expert in obstetrics and gynecology, and was one of the earliest physicians involved in psychological counseling in marriage in Shanghai.
In the two years since the consultation room opened, she has taken over 163 cases.
“For each noisy couple, I only listened to both parties for more than an hour, and some took half a day.
Because of this, she was able to understand the causes of “endangered families”.
She believes that the family of foreign sisters, third-party involvement, and the woman’s superiority to the man’s family are “three big divorced families.”
A “Half-family household” crossed the river and demolished a bridge. A Harbin woman who graduated from a technical secondary school married a Shanghai native for two years and used her “half-family household” status to get a job and a house.
“Wasteless, marry him for eight lives!
The woman surnamed Xu shouted in front of Dr. Xie, letting her husband feel complacent.
It was learned from the outside that after this woman went to a large cosmetics company as a marketing director, she had an ambiguous relationship with the department manager, and thought that she was “different.” Why should she keep this incompetent man all her life?
Dr. Xie analyzed that there are many foreign girls who are highly educated, good-looking, and able to bear hardships and stand hard work, but some of them also look for “springboards”.
“If it is such a person, there is no need to persuade her, and she should be allowed to taste the broken family. She may not have real happiness in the future.
In addition to this, another reason for the divorce of migrant families is also related to the entrenched “exclusiveness” of some Shanghai families.
After a famous Guizhou woman married her husband in Shanghai, after five years of hard work, she opened four beef noodle soup restaurants in Shiquan area, but the man ‘s family always suspected that she was a foreigner, often scornful, and asked her to “only wear Shanghai peopleClothes and speaking Shanghai dialects “eventually led to divorce.
Although the “third party” has a high rate of broken mirrors, the problem of labor separation caused by affair, although relatively old, has become the fuse of broken families in recent years.
According to the incomplete statistics of the Civil Affairs Bureau of Putuo District, about 45% of the families are divorced.
Regardless of men and women, once they have an affair, even if they are forgiven afterwards, the other half will be grieved.
Some even went out of their way to find a psychological balance, eventually causing separation.
Not long ago, a couple received by Dr. Xie was 158 years old.
The 78-year-old wife tells a secret that has been buried for 40 years. It turned out that the 80-year-old husband was derailed when he was young. At that time, she did not break up because of the consideration of 4 minor children, but she was always upset.
This year they attended the golden wedding ceremony held in the street, and met the third party that year to congratulate her husband.
“It turned out that they kept breaking Silian!
“The gate of resentment broke through in an instant, and after a lifetime of grievances, eventually went their separate ways.
”Wife is strong” husband is dissatisfied: According to surveys, in the life of his wife is stronger than her husband’s family break rate is quite high.
Dr. Xie revealed that there are more men who ask for a divorce, “mainly masculinity,” suffering for face “.
Sometimes it can be saved, but there are also many upsets afterwards.
According to analysis, once the wife has made a name for herself with her ability and appearance, she has no time to take care of housework, and sometimes speaks “more urgently and tougher”, which makes her husband think “more money is made, and the tone is stronger, and if you continue to do so, you will climb to your ownGot on, “so the conflict intensified.
It is distressing that couples who were able to share their troubles today cannot face the wealth that comes together today.